One week and one day

It has now been eight days since Beth graduated.  I often wonder about the things she has done and seen.  It must be awesome! This is the faith I have in our Lord, Jesus Christ.

Emotionally, for me it has been strangest journey.  I find myself anxious to get home and tell Beth about the events of the day as if she had just missed out on things because of previous commitment. I find myself using the pronouns that have been natural to me for 44 years, like "we" and "us". These are things that you cannot just turn off.  So the normal anticipation of seeing her and discussing our day, like we have been doing for years, is suddenly met with the fist of reality. Waves.  The world tries to creep in and say; If you just buy some of this stuff it would fill that void she left.  But I know it is a trap and that whatever stuff it is; cars, big boy toys, etc. It holds an empty promise and then I would have the stuff and still the void.

The wounds are still raw.  Not just in me but in my children and grandchildren also.  We know that she is in the loving arms of our God, it is her physical absence that we will have to find a way to accept.